More contenders than column inches in this year's Whitt awards

Updated 8 hours ago

As we count down to 2026, we recognise those who made unique contributions to the world of money in 2025. Here are the annual Whitt Awards, celebrating villainy, incompetence and the occasional lucky escape. Sadly, there were more contenders than column inches.

The Bernie Madoff Award for the biggest financial debacle of 2025 goes to the Shield and First Guardian Master Funds collapse - a mess involving more players than a peak-hour pile-up on the M1. Promoters made tens of thousands of cold calls offering "free super reviews". That innocent-sounding opener funnelled money to advisers paid hefty commissions to roll super into Shield and First Guardian. There was just one problem: the products were rubbish.

Both funds collapsed amid ASIC allegations of widespread misconduct, including overstated asset values, conflicted remuneration, and related-party transactions. Around 12,000 victims now face losses of more than $1 billion.

The spotlight has shifted to the trustees and platform operators who allowed these funds onto their systems. Macquarie has acknowledged failures in its monitoring processes and will repay $321 million to affected members. Diversa, trustee for much of First Guardian's roughly $300 million exposure, is facing ASIC action for a range of breaches of duty. ASIC has also moved against Equity Trustees, alleging it failed its due diligence by allowing the Shield Master Fund onto its platform.

Netwealth has agreed to pay over $100 million in compensation to more than 1,000 Australians who invested their superannuation in the First Guardian Master Fund and has admitted it contravened the Corporations Act. It argued it was merely an administrator - a conduit, not a decision-maker - despite profiting from funds flowing through its system. But platforms are not innocent bystanders: they decide what products are offered, set the rules, and collect fees. When things blow up, claiming "we just provided the plumbing," seems a convenient way to dodge accountability, but that defence has worn thin.

The lesson is obvious - the most expensive phone call you may ever receive is a cold call about investments.

The Wolf of Collins St Award goes to ANZ Banking Group.

ANZ recently reached a settlement with ASIC over a remarkable catalogue of misconduct. This included transgressions surrounding a major Commonwealth bond sale and disturbing treatment of retail customers - both alive and dead. The penalty was a hefty $240 million, along with a $10 million refund of fees. The harm to customers was extensive: hardship notices ignored, interest on deposits unpaid, and fees not refunded to the estates of deceased customers.

The bank is now attempting a reset with a new CEO, Nuno Matos, who faces a massive clean-up task. ANZ employs around 20 per cent more people than Westpac, yet Westpac still generates a higher net operating income.

There has been no mea culpa from former CEO Shane Elliott. Instead, he is suing ANZ to recover the $13.5 million bonus he was promised before the wheels fell off. The bank says it will vigorously defend the claim.

The Super Duper Award goes to Cbus, one of Australia's largest industry super funds, fined $23.5 million after systemic failures left more than 7,000 grieving families waiting months - and in some cases over a year - for death benefits and disability payments.

ASIC found that Cbus failed to act efficiently, honestly and fairly, inflicting financial and emotional stress at the very moment members were least able to cope. Some claims dragged on for more than 365 days due to weak oversight, clumsy processes, and poor monitoring of administrators.

Cbus has apologised, paid $32 million in compensation, doubled its claims staff, and introduced simpler rules, including defaulting payments to spouses. All sensible steps - but too little, too late for thousands of families who needed help, not explanations.

And Cbus is far from alone in these failings. ASIC's review paints a grim picture: chronic delays, indifferent service, and systems that fail members. With compulsory inflows guaranteed, too many funds prioritise investment returns over basic customer service. Regulators have had enough; more penalties will follow.

The Bent COP Award goes to Australian taxpayers, who are spared a monumental burden after Adelaide lost the bid to host a future COP climate conference. The saving? About $2 billion. Frankly, it's a blessing. Nothing debated in Adelaide would have shifted global emissions at all.

What would have been guaranteed is disruption and a surge in emissions. Recent COPs drew about 40,000 politicians, bureaucrats, activists, media, and lobbyists, all flying in from across the globe. Surely emissions from those flights alone would swamp any pledges made. Add security, accommodation, and infrastructure costs and the figures become absurd.

By missing out, South Australia has avoided becoming the stage for a costly, high emission talkfest. Taxpayers should feel relieved. Losing the bid may be the most environmentally responsible - and fiscally sensible - outcome Australia could have hoped for.

I never cease to be amazed how governments that are perpetually crying poor can pull $2 billion out of the air on a whim. I'm sure you can think of far better uses for it - maybe a serious effort to help people sleeping rough? Or perhaps a new stadium in Hobart?

The All Mouth and No Trousers Award goes to Treasurer Jim Chalmers and his Productivity Roundtable.

Much touted and heavily choreographed, the Roundtable turned out to be little more than an expensive talkfest. After three days in Parliament House, 41 preparatory roundtables and nearly 900 submissions, the outcome was vague references to future "structure" and possible reforms.

About the only genuinely newsworthy outcome was the discovery (and introduction into the political fray) of the term "intergenerational inequality", as if it were a sudden revelation rather than a long-standing reality.

If the government genuinely wants results, the answer isn't more seminars. It's cutting red tape, simplifying the tax system, and creating conditions where businesses can grow and innovate. Australia needs action - not another carefully staged discussion.

The King Claw Award for the year's wildest rollercoaster ride goes to Bitcoin.

Bitcoin began 2025 at about US$95,000, surged to a breath-taking US$126,000 in October as hype and FOMO went into overdrive, then slid back to around US$90,000 at the time of writing. Heart-stopping volatility isn't a flaw in Bitcoin - it's the feature. As I've said many times, Bitcoin is a punt: "You pays your money and you takes your chances".

What will happen in 2026? One thing is sure - there will be just as much financial flimflam and corporate chicanery as every other year. You will know better than to take cold calls about investments, put trust in government talkfests, or invest money you can't afford to lose in high risk ventures. And so I can safely wish all my readers a Merry Christmas and a very prosperous New Year.